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As a Taxi Driver we work some long hours and with this we unlike many others spend a large amount of time in a vehicle……..

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Reviews on those items that people never think of and those funny or naughty stories that those involved wish to forget!

Every person has that moment where you should think twice!

We all have those moments when we’re young that looking good is more important than practicality. In this case, it was such an event!

A normal working evening turned into a blizzard snow storm within hours, now i don’t know about where you live but for our area this is pretty uncommon as usually snow seems to miss us as our town is in a dip, ‘literally in a dip that is and we have high sided estates from all sides that meet into the central point being the town’. Now with the common problem (not many people like to walk uphill especially after a night on the town) we as a rule find that most people will get a taxi rather than walking, this is common in most areas as a set of jelly legs and a heavy tummy full of alcohol are not the best combination at the best of times, so when you add the complication of snow to the story you can imagine the problems that follow.

So back to the story, on the evening as the snow started to come down it was a dry evening so it had every possibility of settling on the roads and paths and anything else it could land on, this was at about 7pm so you knew with experience that if it continued it was there for the duration. So the night continued with more snow and at this point the snow had settled it was roughly now 2am and there was between 3-4 inches of snow on the ground so it pretty cold out, to the point where you wouldn’t even get out of the car for a cigarette.

So i had a collection from one of the local night establishments now the venue itself is situated in the town but the entrance/exit is on a slope of probably a 30% gradient making that a pretty good climb either up or down with an intoxicated person, so here comes the best part. A young female exits the establishment on her 6inch platform shoes with nothing than a skin tight black mini dress on, full cleavage on show with no coat and a clutch bag in her right hand, so she starts to walk with the look most people pull as she stares down at her toes of ‘holy shiznit, how the chuff do i do this’ so the face comes up and the scan starts of is there somewhere else where there’s no snow is (the answer is obviously no) but she decided to walk down the slope now please bare in mind there is an alternative option which is circular section of grass that holds a memorial stone and a huge tree that is most likely over 100 years old, so there is a second option which would quite possibly be safer.

‘Now by this point to me i would be holding them shoes in my hand and skidding down the hill on my backside if it meant i was not going to make a pleb of myself by falling over and feeling that in the morning, let alone if someone saw and i got a reminder to add to it as well’. So the shoes were still on making baby step movements to get the the bottom of the slope, you could see her breathe as she moved closer and closer.

‘Now by this point to me i would be holding them shoes in my hand and skidding down the hill on my backside if it meant i was not going to make a pleb of myself by falling over and feeling that in the morning, let alone if someone saw and i got a reminder to add to it as well’. So the shoes were still on making baby step movements to get the the bottom of the slope, you could see her breathe as she moved closer and closer.

Now by this point she had taken ten minutes to get down the slope and had started on the flat to get to the car, so i knew there was a curb coming up soon as the tyres were butted right up to it. So she was finally in front of the car and instinctively i had gotten out for a cigarette (i was so cold i was shivering as i stood trying to drain the cigarette as quick as i could even with my coat, fluffy boots and big knickers in the picture).

She came to the drivers side where i stood and asked ‘is the taxi for Samantha’ to which i replied ‘yes it is’ so with a sigh of relief she had left her guard down and with one step up she did a 360 degree spin and landed with a thud, unfortunately human nature takes over and i went into hysterics at the point she had made it so far and faltered at the last hurdle.

I then offered her help of which she refused but by the look on her red face i don’t know if it was pride, determination or the fact i had laughed that she refused my help but she managed to pick herself back up by rolling from her bum onto her knees and using both hands and the clutch bag to stead to her feet and be upright to continue walking.

Well she made the front door of the car and opened the door but unfortunately as she lifted a foot to step into the front that was it and the legs were back up in the air, this time with one in the car and the other had slid under the door, fortunately for me the little black dress didn’t rise and i wasn’t faced with someone else’s ”breakfast”.

I had no choice now, i had to get out and put her in the car before she did any further damage to herself. So out the car i go being cautious to hold onto the roof rails of the car to not make the same mistake my passenger had, so with one hand i had the railing and with the second i then had to put my arm under her arms and across her chest in an attempt to get her up enough so she could place her feet in the car in a sort of roll in attempt. Finally! she was in and off i trundled to get her to her destination.

Now the achievement level this late teen had was commendable but it was not yet over, we arrived at the destination and it started again as she swivelled round put both feet out and used the frame of the car to steady her outward upheaval, her feet began to slip but she managed to steady herself in an upright position, so she turned round to now be facing the car and moved slightly to the back of the car now using the roof rails for support in order to shut the door.

As she shut the door she let go and continued the baby steps to get up to the front entrance of the block of two storey flats. I then began to start my attempt to turn around at the bottom of the road, luckily for me its more of a t-junction at the bottom so it made it easy with two turns of the wheel i was back on track after my 25 minute ordeal with one customer. I headed up the road to then exit onto the main road across the estate and glimpsed at the doorway of where the late teen should have entered, now with any given experience if you can help it as a driver in the snow you don’t stop unless you have to else you could have problems getting moving again.

As i peered over there she was back on her hands and knees crawling through the doorway i then proceeded to chuckle to myself wondering, why on earth would you be so fearful of how you looked rather than being sensible in your attire or taking the shoes off to save breaking your neck. The reasoning behind any form of young adolescent behaviour always seems to be because of influence in a media form or with a response of ‘why not’?

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